Just Friends, and back to Best Friends

Sometimes in life it is hard to tell the guy you are in love with that it is time to be friends and to let each other grow individually and hope for the best in the future. As I have been thinking, praying, reading my scriptures, and then pondering I have decided just that. As this thought came into my head the answers became clear on what I should do. I read in one of the New Eras what the prophet thinks of girls involved with missionaries as they are on their mission. It is hard not only on the guy but more on the girl as she takes steps in her life during those two years. He advises that girls should not date a guy while he is on his mission. How hard it is for me to hear that but also in another way a relief to know that the prophet understands. He says that dating a missionary can hold a missionary back from putting his whole heart into the mission, also it can cause worrying while that girl is at college and so forth. As he said its great to be a pin pal and encourage him while he is on his mission but that a girl should go do the things which she wants not worrying whether she is doing something wrong and so forth. Derek and I agreed to stay in a relationship as he is on his mission but I could date other people. Well this is how I see it going on dates with other guys would feel weird for me because I am technically still in a relationship. It is causing stress and drama in my life which I don't like.. Derek will be my best friend always He is amazing but after putting a lot of thought and prayer I have got my answer. If Derek and I are meant to be it will happen no matter what. I am not just going to give him the cold shoulder, He is my best friend!! and always has been. I will still be there for him and of course still write him, but I think this will help him to grow even more on his mission and also not worry about me going to college. I love his family and really hope they don't hate me after this but I know this is the right thing to do! I am grateful for the relationship I have with my Heavenly Father who guides me to do what is right. I know Derek will understand and know I am doing this for some stupid reason, he knows me better then I do. I just hope he is more understanding then mad :( well I guess we will see. I wish the best and love the Allen's with all my heart hopefully they don't think differently of me, I just want Derek and I to get the most out of the experiences we are about to embark on separately.
Love Shanel