Baby #2

So maybe you want to know how baby #2 went? Or your just wondering how Im doing after baby #2. Well we will have to start from the beginning.
So on May 1 I went to the doctor. She said I was dilated between a 1 and 2 but I wasn't in active labor. I started talking to one of my besties Stacey and we decided that she would come up for a few days to help me and in case I went into labor. This was the one thing I was most worried about which was Lilly. We didn't want to mess with her schedule to much or take her away from her home if we were in the hospital. So luckily I had Stacey! She got to our house around 10pm that night. On May 2 at 4am  I started having contraction they were 3 to 5 minutes apart but after about 30-45min they began  to go 10min, 20min, then a couple hours. So I just slept. Robbie stayed home and worked from home just in case. And Stacey helped with kids and food. I contracted off and on all day. Then around 5pm they began to be more intense, long contraction and were in the right time frame 3 to 5min apart! So we got our last picture of a family of three and then headed to the hospital!

The drive was about 20min with little to no traffic just hard contraction and lots of breathing. I wanted to walk from the parking lot so Robbie parked. It felt better to walk then sit. I did have to stop a couple times because the contraction were so hard but we got there. Robbie made sure to take photos of this.

They got me into Triage. Checked me I was dilated between a 4 and 5. So I was admitted, the guy came in to do my IV but missed twice (which was so painful) so he called in our delivery nurse Sarah and she did it on the first try and it didn't really hurt. By now my contraction were super hard and I was having horrible back labor so I was screaming a lot... I really wanted my Epidural pronto. So Sarah got us to our delivery room. She realized I was in a lot of pain and she taught Robbie to push on my hips when I was contracting. That was an amazing pain release while we were waiting on my epidural. They needed to take blood and test it before I could get the epidural. However since this was my 2nd go around Sarah asked the Anesthesiologist if I could just get it since I didn't have any bad reactions last time. He came right in and got it going. The first time he went to put it in he hit a nerve (not on purpose) and I felt a shock go through my my right leg. I screamed really loud. So he took it out and re-adjusted and it went right in. He gave me a booster shot while the epidural was taking affect (I love those boosters!) So I just laid right down and relaxed. 

Robbie and I thought we had a while before this little miss was coming. The nurse started asking me questions especially about my past delivery. She reassured me that I would have a way better experience this time. I kept feeling pressure so I wasn't sure if I need to go to the bathroom. The nurse checked me and said I was dilated to a 6. They felt the baby and she was turned at a weird angle so they wanted to get her to straighten out. They had me roll over onto a bean bag to see if she would move. By now I'm really feeling pressure. So she checks me and says you are dilated to an 8 this baby is coming. So they called the doctor in and flipped me back around. She checked me and said yep she coming. So I started to push when I felt that pressure. They didn't rush me or try to force me to push. And at the very end they saw the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck so they had me stop pushing so they could cut it off. Trying to not push is probably the hardest thing to try and do. But they cut the cord and within a couple pushes she was out! I push for maybe 20 min and had the epidural in for maybe an hour or so.

They placed her right on my chest and it was amazing. I cried so hard because I got the moment I wanted last time. I felt so blessed and that Heavenly Father listened to all my prayers and knew all my fears. He helped me to have the right people. Sarah our delivery nurse stayed by my side and even stayed in our room after she moved us to the room we would stay in. I just felt like she cared and knew what I needed at that moment. Super grateful!

We named her Ruby and she is such a cuddly little baby. She really just wanted to sleep on my chest all the time. She passed all of her tests. And when they took her blood and the 24hr mark they gave her some Sucrose and a binky and she didn't even cry. I was so impressed and the nurse stated that a baby shouldn't  cry over these tests. The nurses helped me remember how to breast feed and get her to latch properly. Miss R has a shallow latch because she is smaller then L was. But hopefully we can over come that as she grows.

L came to meet baby sister and she loves her little sister and just wants to give her hugs and kisses. 

That was another worry of mine as well but even at 1 month she is still so in love with her sister.

My healing has gone a lot faster, and I didn't swell this time. I do have a lot of back pain due to my back labor. So hopefully after my 6 to 8 weeks I can start working through that. Trying not to over do it or vacuum......

My dad came into town that following Friday after R was born. It was really nice to have extra pair of hands around and to have someone just hold R or feed L.

Then Ls birthday was May 26 so we went down to Columbus for the long weekend to celebrate with friends and family. Carter the oldest Talbert Cousin turned 8 and chose to be baptized. That was a really big deal for me. Carter is such a great example for his siblings and for my girls. It was great to see L watch as her cousin was baptized! These are important moments I feel for my kids to watch.

Well later that day we had L's Frozen Summer Fever birthday party. We had some yummy mini cakes and pizza. All the kids got to play at the park and L enjoyed opening her presents!

Monday we headed back to Michigan and Tuesday Deborah came to be with us for 5 days! It was nice to have her here and helping and letting me take naps. Or even getting L in the morning so I could sleep in a little. She even took L to the pool which L really enjoyed.

So baby #2 hasn't been bad. I actually feel more calm probably because I have been through this before. I know I will sleep in again some day.  I also have so much support which is nice. But I really enjoy being a mother, I think it has made me a way better person.

39 Weeks & One Day

I really don't know what to write at this moment. I have a lot of thoughts about this week. I mean I'm about to be a mother of two girls. I will say I have people all the time ask me how I am doing, probably because they know how hard the last week is, and also they know about the struggles I had after L's birth. I have really been doing great for the most part. I haven't had an anxiety attack for probably three months, which has kind of been surprising. However I have really felt peace and really tried not to focus on"what could happen". I have also reassured myself that I am in charge and will state to the nurse and doctors if anything seems to be wrong or not right. I really just want my baby, I really hate being pregnant. I always tell people I would rather a new born then being pregnant and they think I'm crazy. But even Robbie feels the same way (and he isn't even the one pregnant). We know what is to come, sure its tiring and hard, throw in a soon to be two year old girl and I can see the struggles we will have. However being pregnant I feel so limited, tired, and achy. I just want to start the healing process.
I think most of all I just want to meet her, I want to see who this little person is and learn all about her. I want L to meet the "baby" we are always talking about. I want to hear L say "she's cute" in her little two year old voice. I want to see the look in Robbie's eyes when he holds his new baby girl, like he did when he held L for the first time. These moments are so precious and very uplifting. I mean I was prompted when L was only three months old that there was another little girl waiting to come down to be a part of our family. Robbie and I worked so hard for 13 to 14 months to be ready for that. We both had to mentally be ready for this whole process and it took us a while to get there.
Now here we are hopefully the last week of pregnancy (hopefully last day ;) ). Doctor say I am dilated between a one or two but no active labor, which is mind blowing because with L I was dilated at a one and in active labor and within three hours I was dilated to a four and thought I was dying and yelling for an epidural... (Pain and I don't mix). You just never know, no matter how prepared you are or how much you have planned for. Things are different, babies are different and pregnancy's are different. All I can do is wait and pray for guidance to know what to do. Here's to the last stretch......................

Being A Mom

I haven't talked about L or being pregnant this time very much. Probably because I have a toddler that I can barely keep up with, due to the lack of oxygen I have because of baby girl in my lungs all the time! However as L is taking her nap I was just thinking about her and really how amazing she is. Motherhood is such a world wind and I think a lot of the time I feel like I'm not doing enough or I'm not being the mom she needs. However these past couple month L has surprised me with her maturity and communication skills. In no way I can take full credit for that, she is the most independent child I know. Since she was born she has known what she wanted and I have tried to provide ways for her to learn how to get them.I also read so many books and articles on parenting. Then I talk with Robbie and then we adjust if need be.
Adjusting is something I have tried to take to heart as becoming a mom, because lets face it nothing on a daily bases is the same and no matter how much planning you have done, your baby has other plans in mind or even emotions.
I also like to say that I never thought I would be that  mom that is semi strict about naps or having an elaborate sleep set up for my child. But here you go. We have always feed and rocked L to sleep since she was a baby. She has never been a cuddlier and never wanted to sleep in our bed (I know your thinking what! why are you complaining) Even as a new born she preferred her bassinet over sleeping next to me, she hated being swaddled and never liked a sling wrap things that people swear by. So feeding/sleep time was that connection time for both Robbie and I.
Here is the thing, people swear not to do that, that they become dependent on it. But amazingly L has adjusted at each stage when she was ready. At nine months she decided she was done breast feeding, at 9 months she decided she didn't like bottles so we switched to a sippie cup. She crawled at around 6 months and she walked at 11 months. She never liked a binky as a baby so that wasn't an issue. Till her side and back teeth came in and then she wanted a binky to just chew on and play with. She does have a blanket that she is very much attached to and has to have it everywhere we go. She started on solids at around 4 to 5 months. She has slept through the night since she was 9 or 10 months old and sleeps till 7:30am-8am! She has always taken naps and if she doesn't its basically the worst day for everyone. Now I'm not saying this to brag or that I have the "perfect child" Because believe me she has her moments and days. We all get frustrated and we all get upset. I say this because I think we get wrapped up in what people say, what articles tell us to do, what books recommend and why. I mean its all great information and some or all of it is very helpful to us. But I think sometimes we have to trust our self. Trust our instincts or even try something that goes against what is "recommended". We are given these little humans because we are meant to be the best parent for them, to teach them the most important things in this life. We aren't perfect at it and we make mistakes but that's also good for our kids to see and understand.
With L I chose to feed her, her milk and then rock her to sleep. She also has black out curtains, a noise maker, a fan and sometimes a humidify going. We take almost all of that stuff with us when we travel!I know we are committed. However she sleeps through the night and doesn't get up at the crack of dawn. I will tell you, the last couple weeks she has had her milk while Robbie or I rock her and when she is done, she hands us her cup and then says "rib, rib" meaning crib. We lay her down and she goes to sleep. No fuss no tantrums. Putting pjs on is a whole other issue (I mean you would think we were hurting her ) but anyways. L has shown me that I know whats best for her, and by trusting myself and doing things that seem a little over kill I have truly enjoyed. I have enjoyed watching her fall asleep in my arms even with a growing belly and her soon to be baby sister kicking L. I have enjoyed watching her grow from my arms to my lap. I have heard special promptings as I just sat there and listened. In these moments I was prompted two weeks before L decided to stop breast feeding that I should cherish these moments because they weren't going to last. Little did I know how fast. Others have been to enjoy these single moments with her because it will never just be you and her again, which is good but remember, remember these moments.
L is my world right now, my first baby and the best little girl I could have asked for. but I owe everything to my Heavenly Father and Heavenly Mother. For showing me how to be her mom and how to love her in the best way, to teach her, and to grow with her. Babies are hard truly! But they teach us so many lessons in life and show us the true meaning of our Savior.
Sorry this is a little longer then I expected but I hope you enjoyed!
Shanel

Valentines Day

So if you dont know this I have always loved Valentines Day probably because of the colors but most of all because my dad never for got to remind, not only my mom but also my sister and I that he loved us. I woke up for 19 years to flowers in my room and a card telling me how proud he was and how much he loved me. My dad created an example of how I needed to be treated and he understood that one of my love languages was recieving gifts.
So after I got married Rob has taken over that role like a champ and is always spoiling me and making sure I feel loved. He does an amazing job at it and really thinks about the gift he is going to give me. However me on the other hand I really really struggle in this department. Many of my "awesome" gifts that I have tried to come up with either take a month longer to get here, broken when we recieved them, or just really werent as "awesome" as I thought. Rob would disagree and say he loves all my gifts but I think he is just being nice 😉.
On the other hand since September of last year we have been part of Jordan Page (funcheaporfree.com) BudgetBootcamp.com and have been paying off debt like crazy. We took a little break in November and bought somethings we both have really been wanting for a while. However now that it's the new year we have really been getting back into gear. We have some pretty hefty goals to meet by July. A new baby coming in May and a two year mark to be completly debt free! It might seem a little far fetch but when you really find a system that works, you sacrifice for a short time, and you start paying things off you really feel like you're accomplishing things.
So with that we took some advice from Jordan, where her and her husband switch off Valentines Day and their Anniversary! So I have Valentines Day and Rob had our Anniversary this year! Then next year we switch. We figured we would save money by one of us just spoiling the other. Believe me, I had some great plans, like a couples massge. However I have to be a least 8 months pregnant in order to get one at the spa I really wanted to go. So that was a bust. The Disney Lion King on Broadway is in Michigan right now but all the good seats are taken and I didnt want to risk $300 tickets (for both) to be a waste. I was feeling a little discouraged because I wanted to do my best! Seriously Rob deserves a great night with how hard he works, at work and at home. So I just started talking to him about things he wants to do. He said you know I really just want to go to the movies! I thought what!?? However he then said, since L was born we haven't gone to a movie theater. We used to do that a lot and I enjoyed it! So I got to work. I will let you know about how it goes later, since I still have a week and half!.
But heres another thought. Jordan Page the mommy blogger I talk about a lot. Was talking about the trips her and her husband were taking this year and how and why they can do it. She stated something that hit me hard and reminded me of our goals. They are in a place in there life where they are out of debt, savings in the bank, retirement is being saved, their business are making money. She said we are in "Phase 2" of budgeting. Which means they can save and plan for "expensive" trips. This point that I want to make is you have to scarifice so you can live your "dream life". So to have my dream life of traveling and being debt free. I have to just stick with some simpler dates. That way we can eventually plan for those more exciting trips! Being reminded of the big picture is sometimes what we need in life. When we are in the middle of our own struggles or hard goals it can be hard to think we will ever accomplish them. But when we have support and encouagement we can do it. And I have to remind myself that I put way more preasure on myself as an individual, wife and mother then anyone else. In reality I'm doing a pretty good job not perfect but none of us are. 

To be 25

As I sit here in bed waiting for my little 16 month old to wake up (it's 8am!!). I can't help and reflect on what it means to be 25. What it means to most women my age to be 25!
I keep thinking wow I have done a lot in my life! Trusted in God a lot in my life. I graduated high school (the first out of all my siblings with out getting a GED.) I went to college. I went on a 3 week study abroad to Turkey and Greece.
I got married to my best friend!
I graduated college with an associates (by faith that I wasn't giving up, but just trying to figure out what I wanted to do when I grew up.)
I got an awesome job that showed me a skill I never thought I had. then got offered an even better job due to that skill.
I had the most precious little girl who I currently stay home with.
To most this doesn't seem like the dream life. And for some that's ok. Because in this great big world we need women to be who they want to be. Weather that's having a career or working on cars. Or if that means being a mother or promoting world peace. We are all needed in this world, we as women have a very unique place in this world. The world can not continue to grow with out us! We are essential in the plan of life!
So on this day that I turned 25 I appreciate all that I have done even if it wasn't typical or maybe not that excited to some. I can tell you these years have been filled with more joy, laughter, hugs and kisses, then tears and hardships. I think I will take this life everytime because it truly has been amazing and I have loved every minute of it!

Normal

I have realized I hate the word normal when it comes to something that you are going through. As we go through life we have experiences, some of us experience things sooner then we should and other maybe later then they should. However none the less it's the journey of life. But when someone expresses concern, challenge, frustration, any manner of emotion we like to say "That's Normal".
But as we say it we push that person's emotion to the side as if it's no big deal. That we should accept emotion, trial, hardship in our life and try to move on.
But again why do we do that!? Why do we push our emotions and other people's emotions to the side. Is it fear, is it not wanting to feel uncomfortable, or is it we don't want to deal with the emotion that we are feeling at that state in life?
As a women I am told to be strong, to keep myself in check, and to not share my true self because of what people might think. But how damaging is that to a women? To someone who has emotional changes in her body and mind everyday.
As a new mom you hear that's normal, that's normal, that's normal. Sometimes it reassuring, but other times is frustrating. I know this is normal  because you have been there, but for the past 20 something years being a mother wasn't normal? Having a baby wasn't  normal? And why is it not ok for me to processes this, or to experience my emotional struggles. It doesn't mean I don't love my baby or I don't want to give her the best life possible, or that I love her any less. This isn't about her, this is about me, about how I feel and it's not Normal!

When we have mental struggles after becoming a new mom, we are told that its normal. But when we realize it's more then Baby Blues (a real condition after having a baby). We tell the mother, your overwhelmed, it's a baby, "it's normal". But again I have new hormones in my body, I have a baby attached to my breast all day, nothing about my body is normal or feels NORMAL. As I go through this new day to day life. I feel like it will never end, but it does I begin to sleep again and start to gain my path into motherhood. However as I find myself still struggling mentally I realize it's not NORMAL. I realize I probably need therapy to deal with my thoughts and emotions. But I hesitate, I don't want people to think I'm crazy or uncapable of taking care of my baby. I don't want people to see this struggle I'm having at this moment and that's all they remember! So I hide it, I play it off, I think it will pass. But it becomes more intrusive these thoughts, emotions, fears, and so on. Why did I need to suffer that why did I need to put myself through that in fear of what people might think? If people do think that shame on them! Surround yourself with people that actually care about you!

Now does that make me weak? Does that make me seem like an unfit mother? Does that make me any less spiritually strong?
NO by accepting and realizing something might not be right, you are being healthy you are realizing you can be better and do better. By sharing your struggles and accomplishments it makes you human, it makes you Brave, and it makes you help other women dealing with the same issues at the same time!

However if you do think differently of me, I hope it's in a greater way. I hope that you look around and realize your not a lone. Those sleepless night, late night feedings, never endless diaper changes, and all the things that come with motherhood is a journey.
This journey is about you and what type of mother you want to be, what type of women in society you want to be. So let's stop making excuses, beating around the Bush, telling every new mom that's Normal so get it together! You have the right to be a first time, second time, or even third time mom. Every step of life brings challenges, some to expect and some we don't.
So I'm going to say the word that freaks so many people out Mental Illness! It's serious and it's really!

Just now they are starting to study this specifcally to pregnancy and postpartom!
"researchers are currently studying the special problems of treatment for serious mental illness during pregnancy and the postpartum period.
The mental disorders affecting women include the following:
Anxiety Disorders, including OCD, panic, PTSD, social phobia, and generalized anxiety disorders." And so many more!!
Mental illness will affect 1 in every 4th person. Sometime in their life!
About 10% to 15% of women are affected by Baby Blue, postpartum depression, and so on. It can come right after the baby or a year later. Symptoms can last a few weeks, months, or even years.
So why, why when we hear, mental illness, depression, anxiety, and so forth do we look the other way. Or think this will pass, you will figure it out! For some it might be true. For others it's not, as spouses and families we need to educate ourselves more on these new situations. Learn more about these conditions. We need to be able to encourage and uplift those around us!
For some this maybe Normal but for me it is not! I just want to live a more healthy life, free of limitation that hold me back from being the person, women and mother I want to be.
I hope as family, friends, follower, viewer you see that I'm human, I'm a damn good wife and mother and I love my daughter to the moon and back! But to do that I need to take care of myself whatever that means I need to do. I want to share with you my accomplishments but also hardships that shape me and help me to reach those accomplishments.
I have posted links below of some of the information I used in this post. Learn more about Postpartum Depression, and other research being done to help women all over the world adapt to being a mother.

https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2005/December2005/docs/01features_02.htm

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/women-and-mental-health/index.shtml

ONE

So I was at a BBQ with some friends last night. When we started talking about what we wish we would have known before giving birth. We talked about how your emotions are pretty high, how sleep deprived you are, and to give yourself some slack. I started thinking yes that is very true!
I was lucky enough to have my mother in law with me the first three months and she told me it takes a year to start feeling like  yourself again. So I was trained/ learned the hard way, it's true! It take ONE full year for your body to completely recover from caring a child for 9 + months, giving birth,  then breast feeding, healing, and the emotional ups and downs of caring for a baby. L just turned one last month and I can tell you these past couple of weeks have been amazing!
I feel more and more like a new version of myself. I have began to love my body, fit into my prepregnancy jeans (this past saturday!) And found myself as a mother.
Of course things are not perfect, I will never have the body I had before I had my little L! But that's OK and it's OK to give yourself that one year to recover! Enjoy the moments know that we are all feeling the same way or have been there!
Shanel

Mother's Day

As I think about Mother's Day and what it means to me, I start to think about all the women in my life that are huge examples to me.  However I do not want to talk about that, I want to talk about the one women you brought me into this world, and raised me to be the person I am today.
As a mother you sacrifice your body, mind, time, privacy, quiet time, and so much more. All in hopes that some how you will raise this little person to be a good person and able to take care of themselves.
Well I think when it came to me I am sure my mom had no idea what to do with me. I mean I was that little toddler at a restaurant who would just scream... for no reason... I had brother way older then me but some how at a young age was able to beat them up. I needed a lot of attention and a lot of time.
No matter what I did or how much of a stinker I was, my mom loved me. She never blamed me for anything and always sacrificed anything for me! She made sure I was able to take 6-8 hours of dance classes during the week as I was young. Made sure I had everything to start school and be the very best I could at whatever I did. She pushed me and taught me to strive for whatever I wanted to do. When I wanted to have parties at our house, she was game and made so much food. She taught me to never settle for anything or anyone! My mom was there for me, loved me, and would do anything for me!
Now she may feel that now I don't need her or that I have forgotten about her. However I have not! I think about my mom everyday and pray that she will be guided and blessed! That Heavenly Father watches over her and protects her. Because in reality I wouldn't know what to do with out her! Who would I Facetime in the middle of day when Lilly is bored and is tired of listening to me! You are the person who knows me best and knows just what I need!
I want to thank you for all you have done for me and all you continue to do for me! You are one in a million mom and how grateful I am for you! Happy Mothers Day!
Love
Shanel

The Meaning of Love

So today I feel a weird NEW sense of love for Miss. Lilly and my husband Robbie. I think maybe its because I have a sense of peace that everything is going to be ok, and that my Heavenly Father has a plan. My husband works extremely hard not only in school and working full time but also trying to get a job that he really wants. Lilly is healthy and strong, and I have been able to keep working while I am pregnant.

My pregnancy defiantly hasn't been a cake walk which many of you know. However I am grateful that Lilly is strong and healthy even if it means I suffer physically and mentally for 9 months straight.
I think it is funny how as women, most of us have children but our perspectives are so different. Some  women LOVE being pregnant and find all the new things happening to their body amazing.

And to me, I find something new almost everyday that I am a little scared of haha. Pregnancy has always scared me, probably because you have no idea how your body is going to react. Once I realized that I was going to be sick, achy and frustrated most of this time. I kind of accepted it. Okay maybe some days I don't accept it however I have these moments of excitement and think about what Lilly is going to look like, if she is going to have hair (because I think babies look weird without hair), is she going to be like me or like Robbie, really who is she going to be?

Sooner then I know it, I will have her here and having those sleepless nights which I have no idea how I will do. But ladies you keep telling me you just adapt, its natural. Well we will see how natural my instincts are because sleep is pretty natural ;).

Last night was a pretty special moment, I was able to get dinner done and finish a little of Robbie's Valentine's Day gift. Then I went and picked Robbie up at work and we got to eat dinner together and then we played a game. It was just a relaxing night of just us two. Then it hit me to saver these moments because it soon will be three. I then just felt overwhelmed with love, seriously an unconditional love for the man sitting right next to me. I have moment like this almost everyday or at least once a week. Where Robbie surprises me with who he is, he shows me in such little ways of how great of a person he is. His desire for fairness, truth and right, hard work, unconditional love, forgiveness, and even the things that frustrate him, I fall in love with. I have learned that our strengths and weaknesses make us individuals. I am not perfect and Robbie is not perfect but I feel that our love for each other is perfect because it is ever changing and we realize we are both not perfect. We learn, and we grow together and I wouldn't change that for anything.

I just feel grateful to have someone as understanding as Robbie Talbert he makes life way more fun and I am grateful for Lilly to have such an amazing man as a father. Just hearing Robbie pray for her and me melts my heart, or when he comes home and rubs my belly to say hi to Lilly, or when he tries to catch her kicking and hitting me. You just don't think your capacity to love could grow any more then it has but it does and I think it helps me to have a small glimpse of how much our Heavenly Father loves each and everyone of us.

Well I hope you all have a

Happy Valentine's Day

Lilly Sage

So I am sure you all want to hear about Little Miss Lilly even though she is not even born yet.

So let me start off by saying Robbie and I new that we were going to plan on having children soon and we kind of go with the flow with everything so that is how this all started.
I usually take birth control for 6 months and then I go off of it. Its really my own theory and no scientific aspect behind it. I take the lowest dose there is on the market and I only have 4 day menstrual cycles. However I have horrendous cramps that run down to my toes all the way up my spin, so being on birth control helps a lot with that. However I have this fear that my body will get used to it or some how make me not be able to get pregnant haha. So needless to say the previous months were during this time.

When I am off birth control my cycle is always a little off, and I can remember talking to Robbie like would it be bad timing if I got pregnant? He thought about it for a second and then just said no because our main goal was to be graduated from College and by the time you have the baby I should be graduated. Well two months later I was pregnant!  So we weren't trying but if it happened we weren't apposed to it.

At first I actually had a burst of energy and was getting up and getting ready for work. Then about week 4 or 5 hit and I was so sick that I couldn't leave the house. I can remember crying to Robbie because I was so confused why does this have to be so hard. Doctors, friends, and family said it will pass just wait till your 2nd trimester.... Well I ended up getting dehydrated and had to go in for 2 IV'S, they put Zofran in it and I have never felt so good and so hungry at the same time. Well getting the IV in was a little messy because I have Whipple veins which are really small. So she tried my left arm but then it stopped dripping so then she had to do my right arm. My left arm started to bleed out a little and yeah I lost it, I started to dry heave and I warned the nurse I am going to throw up. I had two needles in my arms so I couldn't hold anything so she grabbed a pan and yeah you know what happened. After that she cleaned my arm up and then got the IV going on my right arm. I proudly took a nap as that was going on.

Well after all that drama I  was put on two different nausea medicines. Zofran during the day and Phenergan (not sure about spelling) at night. Wow did I feel better, I was actually able to eat and it felt great. Well after a month the doctor wanted me to start to see if my body could handle it with out the medicine and needless to say I got really sick again and would just sit on the floor at work and try to see if it would pass. However it didn't and I lost 4 pounds. So the doctor stated well some women have to be on nausea medicine till they deliver you might be one of them. I said as long as I can take something I should be fine! However this time I just take one either in the morning or at night so that is better.

I kind of always said I hope its a girl at least I would feel better about being sick. Nothing against boys but I feel I wouldn't be as sick if it was a boy and maybe I'm right because we are having a little girl and oh how I am so excited!

When we went to find out what we were having, Lilly was laying on her tummy and didn't want to move so she looked like she was kicking at the camera and finally the nurse said well there you go its a girl!!!!! I almost cried but I didn't! It was really cool to see her and how funny she likes to lay on her tummy because I am the same way.. And I defiantly don't like people poking me and moving me when I sleep.

So now we are preparing for Robbie to graduate in April, yep about 6 weeks before baby is due! We are hoping to move before she is born and Robbie will start a new job some where but we shall see! She already seems a little like her mom so she may be eager to come out but hopefully not to early!

We are planning on being pretty simple with this baby, I live in a place where there are many women having babies, many which are due right around me! What I have learned is that most of the stuff you spend lots of money on you use maybe once and then end up giving away. So we are planning on having things from our baby shower, a pack and play with a raised part, and a few clothes and diapers and such. But we just figure if we need something we will just go out and buy it. Plus trying to move with a bunch of things doesn't seem ideal. So these next five months will be pretty fun but we are excited for all the new adventures to come plus to leave Rexburg!

Taylor Swift

So if you can't tell this post will be about Taylor Swift. If you know me or are my family and you ask who is Shanel's favorite singer? I am pretty sure 99% of the time they would say Taylor Swift. I can honestly say that Taylor Swift has been an example to me since I was in high school. We could relate in so many ways and we weren't even real friends. But her songs touch young girls and  now even women in so many ways. Between not fitting in, crushes that never notice you, to horrible break ups, and even bullying. I have talked on my blog about women just letting go of their judgments and just living their life. But recently Taylor Swift has shown me again why she is one of my examples and that is from this article.

A young girl about to start high school was feeling judge and never good enough and reached out to Taylor Swift. Not only did she respond she reminded us that people will just be MEAN. That no matter what you do it will not change because it is people that are the problem not just kids like Taylor stated.

These children that are growing up now are learning from everyone around them, how to act, how to talk, and how to treat people. We are the problem a lot of the time, because we judge people for their dreams and for some reason get jealous when those around us are more talented or express their dreams. But why? Why do we do that?

Is it pride, jealousy or all of the above? Taylor reminded me today to look at myself and remind myself to NOT be the problem today. To be a better person today and to not let anyone crush my dreams no matter who they are.

Think about her new song "Shake it Off", she reminds us that no matter who we are we will be judged, we will be put down. But how we react to those critics is what really matters. Let go of those that have hurt you in the past or even today and be the person you want to be!

So yes I love Taylor Swift because even as a celebrity she is herself and no one else. That's what makes her a great a example in my eyes. Sure she dates a lot people but so did I, sure she talks about her break ups, and enemies but who doesn't. She just reminds us that she is human, makes mistakes and in the end puts the words right into our mouth that we wish we said at that moment in our lives!

So my challenge for those that just gave a judgment today is to look at yourself, how is that judgment helping those around you or the person you are judging?

My challenge to those that feel judged don't let their insecurities make you insecure! You are perfect in the eyes of God and talented in your own way. Do the things you want to do and let the "haters hate". And remember Taylor Swift has felt what you feel! So find a song that relates and just dance until you feel better! That's what I do ;)

Thoughts from a Relief Society President

 

So if you don't know what Relief Society is in the LDS church its a pretty amazing organization. Women of 18 years and older of the church are part of Relief Society. As sisters we grow together, help each other, and look after each other. That is the purpose of Relief Society! If you want to read more about it here is a link.



Well in my Ward I am the Relief Society President of a newly married student ward. My presidency and I are over 80-140 sisters! With that comes a lot of different circumstances, personalities, and back grounds! Its actually quiet amazing if you think about it. I have the privilege to help these ladies and be guided by the spirit to help them in any way.

I have seen a lot of amazing things happen  in this ward. I go to a ward that 85-95% members are active, and visiting teaching and home teaching is a lot higher then in most family wards. I have made a lot of friends and gotten to know more people then in any calling I have ever had.

One of the best things I take from my calling is the people that sit next to me during Relief Society! My first and second counselors and secretary. I have had two 1st counselors, three 2nd counselors, and have had the same secretary nice the very beginning, and its only been 10 months! I have been blessed with these sisters in my life. They have all taught me something different! Such as when to stand up for myself and the women around me. It is easy to sit on the side lines but as a leader in my ward I need to give my thoughts and opinions. I have learned how to see people more Christ like and to realize we all have some limitations in our life. I have learned the willingness to serve even when life becomes hard or things change in our life. I have learned to not take upon myself to much. I have learned that my calling is important but my husband is even more important. I and those around me need to be able to be with their families. To make meetings productive and not excessive or to long! To rely on these sisters to do their very best! I look up to these sisters because they have a strength or values that I struggle with. We help up lift each other and to make each other better. To see the women we are over not only as human but as sisters!

I feel I am so blessed to have this calling and not only learn a lot about myself but to learn about others as well. To feel the spirit guiding me to those that need me and I need them! The spirit continually guides me to do my very best! I love you all! I hope that ever sister will find a love for Relief Society as I have!

"Forgive and Forget" Words of Wisdom!

So this post isn't dramatic but it is truth, well what I consider truth. So I guess take it however you want.

I had a conversation with one of my friends the other week and this has been on my mind a lot. I consider myself and nice person, who means well, but also makes mistakes, and I may say the wrong things at the wrong time! Yeah it happens... Why does this happen? Well because I am human. To be human means that I am not perfect and I will make mistakes. However being human also means I will not get a long with everyone, and not everyone will like me, no matter how nice I am.

This is the circle of life, it is VERY rare when I don't "like" someone, usually it is because of my insecurities. Or we simple live different lives. However I would never go out of my way to brutally be mean to them or even talk behind their back. That just isn't right! I feel that no matter how much that person bugs me I should give them some respect. We have agency to choose what we do in this life, however we don't have the ability to choose the consequence whether good or bad. So I would rather be nice to someone then mean!

I believe however if you are trying to be a good person, and trying your very best at what ever you are doing. You NEVER have to apologize for who you are. Especially as a women, we all have different dreams and out looks on life. We learn differently, we fell spiritually in different ways, we dress differently, we act differently, and so on..... But two thing we have in common is we are human and we are women! What more do I need to say besides, stop putting people down because they are different then you! Love them unconditional and hope the very best for them!

Obviously we have our moral inclination and there is a time and place for that, if you mean it in the most loving way! However we should not be brutally naming each other, or hurting each other in any way. I was taught to love those even if they are different.

I'm not perfect and I don't always act perfect but that doesn't mean I'm not trying  to do my best or I'm not trying to get where I need to be. I just had a bad day, or something just didn't go right that day. Also, I just sometimes want to sit and watch tv ALL day, or eat a whole thing of cookie dough, and sometimes I just don't want to do anything! Call it laziness but I call it relaxation :)

Only one person has ever been perfect on this earth and that is Jesus Christ, but no one on this earth will ever be perfect. So stop judging, talking, or even being mean to that person! They don't deserve it and neither do you. I promise you that if you work on seeing people how Christ does you will not get upset as much or defensive! Just love people and realize they are different, they make mistakes and you are just the same! We should embrace people different then us, because they bring a different perspective and ideas.

So this is to those that feel judged, bullied, or even hurt! You are human and you will make mistakes, and so will those around you. "Forgive and Forget" the best words my father ever taught me, also "Don't dig in the grave yard, the past is the past"! Words of wisdom from the best dad. A man who has come before me, and knows what its like to be at my age! And now I pass it on for you!

P.S. no one has put me down or anything but I see a lot of girls around me doing it and I see the hurt it does.

Life as we know it

So a lot has happened in my life this year and its all exciting things.

Last October I started working at the Cocoa Lodge here in Rexburg. Its a delicious little Lodge filled with Chocolate and flavors. In the fall and winter they do flavored hot chocolate and in the spring and summer they make Frozen Hot Chocolate. Basically its cocoa powder in a frozen a drink, seriously the best thing I have had in a long time and very addicting.

 Well as this business started I was their to help Katie with all the social media. It was amazing to me all the things I found myself learning. The social media world is a crazy one and businesses really have to be on the ball in order to get people to "follow" and "like" them. However it is a great resource for advertising as well.

As fall semester was ending I was really dreading school and not really happy with my degree I had chosen. I looked at my graduation plan and noticed that I wouldn't graduate till 2 semesters after Robbie. This is a problem because Robbie and I want to move as soon as he graduates and gets a job. This got me thinking I am paying thousands of dollars to go to school to get a degree I don't even plan on using, just so I can have a piece of paper that says I graduated in something. So Robbie just said well just graduate with your associates, you must have that by now.. At first I thought excuse you, you are supposed to tell me to keep going. He then explained "Shanel I love you no matter what you do as long as you are happy!" Wow talk about husband of the year award.

So I prayed about it and it felt right for me. That's the thing, I loved school but could never find that path that was leading to something I was excited about and willing to work hard enough in those classes everyone hates. However I have found new ways to educate myself in the things I love, such as social media.

So as time went on Robbie told me about this job on Craig List for a real estate company here in town. I thought I have only had one job in an office and it was only for a couple months till I came back to school. There is no way I am qualified for this job. However Robbie said it is worth a try, so I put in my resume and I didn't hear anything for 3 weeks. I just figured oh I must not even qualify for the job. Then I got a phone call for an interview. I seriously looked up everything I could to prepare myself for this interview. When I got there it seemed good, we went through my resume and I started talking about my experience, when they started asking more about the social media aspect of my job with the Cocoa Lodge. I was like really all you guys interviewed me for was my experience with social media! Wow! haha

So after all the questions and going through what they would want from me in that aspect. They challenged me to come back with a plan if I got a second interview. I said ok I will prepare for that.
I was pretty shocked after that interview, I really was surprised. However being the girl I am, I started preparing a plan. I didn't even know if I had a second interview but I was excited. However by the end of that day they called me back to schedule a 2nd interview.

So for the next two days I did research and came up with a plan. I walked into the interview and talked with the owner of the company and his brother. They asked me a bunch more questions and then we went over my plan. We talked for over an hour, I finally had to say I needed to go to get to my job... Well I left confident and anxious, I was scared to get the job because of the people I worked with were so great to me. However, I think I would have been more sad if I didn't get the job. However within two hours of my 2nd interview they called to let me know that I got the job.

Seriously I didn't know whether to cry or scream!

Well I went through all the training and now I have been on my own for a couple weeks now. I re- organized the office and got everything clean and refreshed. Now I am starting on all the social media things with CountryWide Properties, Inc. . When I started the interview process with this company I felt like I had something ahead of me, that this was my path in life, or the beginning of something big.

I not only have the real estate company, all the agents have other businesses that they run, they also need my help on the social media as well. So I am always busy and have plenty to do which is really nice.

We shall see where this takes me in life, its amazing how far a little job at a chocolate shop can start you on a bigger path to greater things!

Bridget's Baby Shower!

One of my Counselors was Pregnant so I decided to put on a baby shower for her. Really I jut like putting on parties so its a good excuse =).

The colors are pink and gray! Which if anyone knows me I love the color pink and really anything sparkly!

So I decided to do a sweet but simple theme.

I bought some tissue paper and made some tissue flowers
I bought the pink fans from Amazon
Then I just used streamers that I had from previous parties

In stead of onesies I had the girls decorate the bib's. I feel that as a mom it maybe hard to use the onesies. My mother also says that babies can never have to many bib's also these bib's have plastic behind them. That prevents their food from seeping through.

The Food I simply did some veggies, cupcakes, and smokies.

However one thing I learned from this. Is don't put the smokies in the crock pot over night on low. Thats to long for them. Simply put the smokies in the crock pot in the morning or a couple hours before the party. 

I also had pink lemonaid, mason jars and the cute chevron straws.

I had a lot of fun with these ladies and I think Bridget got a lot of nice things for her little girl!! 

Oh and Bridget had her baby on Wed morning and Stephanie and I went to go visit them that night! We fell in love with Ms. Vienna

Heavenly Father Trusts You

Being a Relief Society President for a newly married ward may seem to be easier then other wards. Yes most of us are around the same age and most of us have families at the same stages. However since October when I was sustained as the Relief Society President I have noticed a few things. 1 never assume people have it all together. I have encountered situations where I thought wow that sister has it all together and is so strong. Then I come to find out why they are strong and also what their weakness are. Sometimes actually a lot of the time I struggle to understand what many sisters are going through. I have been very blessed in my life to have a supportive family, supportive and caring husband, and many blessing placed upon us at this time in our life. I have a blessing that states that I will have a "charmed" life if I live worthy. I never new what that meant at 16, however I knew I had a big job on this earth. Sometimes I feel that Heavenly Father trusts me with to much. Some moments I can not see or know what I am supposed to do. However I have known that through action I can make a difference.

Heavenly Father has trained me from a young age to act, pray, and then do. He always has me make a decision then to ask him if it right. For the most part he doesn't disagree. I have found that if you have a righteous decision God will bless you with the path you choose. For instance (as a women) we have the option to choose to go on a mission or not. Now that the age limit has been lowered to 19 I feel that many young women may face a choice. Should I stay or should I go. Many return missionaries may face rejection due to a young girl going on a mission rather then perusing a marriage at that moment.

Mission and marriage are NOT bad decisions, both have their places, and both can come sooner or later in life. For me I always thought I would serve a mission, however my husband came first. For me I didn't question whether to go on a mission or get married because I had the guidance of the Holy Ghost throughout the whole time I was dating my husband (which was 8 months). Then I continued to get that reassurance when we were engaged (which was 4 months). The age limit was still 21 and I did get married when I was 19 (almost 20) so I had at least 2 years before that pressure came on me.

The whole point of this post is that decisions are hard. The reason we are here is to make decisions and learn from them. However it is easy for use to regret our decision. As women we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to "make the right decision" when in fact Heavenly Father trusts you. He also Trusts you to trust him. Sometimes our path has a lot of bumps and sometimes our path doesn't. Those bumps/trials can come from some of our decisions. However we must remember that if the Lord said OK, then tomorrow it is still going to be a good decision.

Stacey's Baby Shower

Sorry everyone I forgot to add this Last Summer!

I have been putting together one of my really good friends baby shower which has been a lot of fun.
here colors are orange, navy blue, and gray and can I just say I love the colors. The decoration have really come together and here is where I got all my ideas

First were the invites you can use this really for any occasion and they look professional and cute.
You can find a lot of cute party labels, and other things you need for the party there also.

Second was the banner, I unfortunately do not have a cricket so I had to go to a local craft store and use their cut outs but they are supper cute. I did Orange flags, with navy blue letters and then cute and Elephant out and put it in the middle. This idea came from my own head =) I really love making banners. (You can kinda see it here, sadly I didn't get a picture!)

Third are the geometric shapes (instead of lanterns). These are made from tissue paper and are super easy to do. I liked this better because Stacey is having a boy and doing tissue flowers or lanterns just seem a little girly to me. I just love this and its unique to anything I have seen.

Fourth would be the activities. So we have 3 activities that we are having the girls do.

1. The guest book: instead of a guest book we are doing this cute picture with a baby elephant hanging from "string" which people will write their names on cut-out dots and then glue them on the picture. This way Stacey has a record of who came and can use it as decoration for the babies room. (the link doesn't show you how to make this, but its pretty easy to print a calendar off and buy a stamp that matches the theme)

1. The diaper changing bucket: This is for the ladies that are attending to write encouraging messages to Stacey, so when she has those late night baby changes she can be reminded of all the women who love her.

1. Decorating Onsie's: We want the ladies to be able decorate a onsie for Stacey so she has a little piece of her friends with her when she leaves in September.