Just some pondering and thinking

So A lot has happened in the last 3 years of my life I will first start off with meeting my husband who the lord has guided to me. I know there has been a lot of articles going around about how we choose our husband/wife, how to commit, how you should treat your marriage or even how you should parent. I do agree with a lot of what they have to say but some of it I don't. I want to share some insight I have had through the past couple of months as all these articles have been flying through Facebook and even being debated over.

I think we all have personal, and spiritual experience that bring us to the person we choose to marry. The path is not easy and has its ups and downs whether its through dating or the first couple of months of marriage. For me it was during dating.

 I am a student at BYUI and everyone feels the pressure to get married. However when my husband and I met we felt that pressure and sat down and talked about it. We decided that we were going to enjoy our dating life and see where it brought us. We had a blast together and really got to see who each other where. We let each other grow by living in different states and talking on the phone. This helped us to really get into each others minds and ask real questions. I left on a study abroad soon after returning from that long summer. We then had to decide if we would continue to date or take a break. However the thought of not being together broke my heart and his heart.

We soon knew that through these "trails" we would be able to make it. I spoke to him almost everyday on my study abroad telling him all the wonderful things I had learned and saw. He talked about how being and Engineer Major was going to kill him. We over came a lot together, even more then I am sharing here. We grew spiritually together and we new we loved each other.

We got married and guess what? We had to learn more about each other and how to adjust to living with each other and how to be husband and wife. However we did it together. I think that is the most important thing. Is doing it together!

We will find the person we want to marry whether through spiritual guidance from god, through a best friend, or someone that that is sitting across from you in a class. However, it happens in your own experience, its your life choices and it's your own individual decisions that will bring you to that person. My experiences will never be the same as the person next to me. But my decision will affect the rest of my life and the rest of the future generations ahead.

Life doesn't get easier and that's why we choose a spouse, because it is so much easier to go through the hardships of life with someone by your side then by your self.

You may find that you feel a lone sometimes however that is your choice and your spouse choice. I think a lot of what the articles going around are stating is don't think about yourself so much. Or think about what would make you happy and TALK about it with your spouse. If there is a silence in your marriage break it! Never let anything get in the way of the people you love.

And sometimes an agreement, hurt feelings, or even a bad day can be solved with a simple "I'm Sorry". For a girl this is hard to understand because most of us like to talk everything out. But for my husband it means the world to him if I just look at him and simply say those two words. That's it!

All I am simply stating is that you have a personal experience through out your whole life. Enjoy it, do what you feel is right, and love it the rest of your life. The past will never change but the future is full of a thousand possibilities.

Shanel